Introduction
“Jingle All the Way” is a classic Christmas movie that tells the story of a father named Howard Langston who is desperate to get his hands on the hottest toy of the season, Turbo-Man, for his son. Along the way, he encounters various obstacles and hilarious situations. The movie is full of memorable quotes that have become a part of popular culture. In this article, we have compiled a list of the top 30 “Jingle All the Way” quotes that will make you laugh out loud and get you in the holiday spirit.
1. “It’s turbo time!”
This iconic line is repeated throughout the movie by Howard Langston and his son Jamie. It has become one of the most famous catchphrases from “Jingle All the Way”.
2. “Put that cookie down! Now!”
Howard Langston is not too pleased when he finds out that his son’s school is having a Christmas party and he forgot to bring cookies. This line has become a popular meme and is often used during the holiday season.
3. “I’m not a pervert. I was just looking for Turbo-Man doll.”
After Howard accidentally enters a women’s locker room while searching for a Turbo-Man doll, he tries to explain himself to the angry women. This line is one of the funniest moments in the movie.
4. “You guys give up, or are you thirsty for more?”
During a wild chase to get a Turbo-Man doll, Howard taunts his rival, Myron, with this memorable line.
5. “You can’t bench press your way out of this one.”
After Myron challenges Howard to a fight, Howard comes back with this witty remark.
6. “A toy… I need one!”
Howard realizes the gravity of the situation when he sees how many parents are waiting in line to get a Turbo-Man doll. This quote perfectly captures his desperation.
7. “What’s so funny?”
Howard is not amused when he sees a group of people laughing at him for wanting a Turbo-Man doll. This line is a classic example of his character’s frustration and determination.
8. “I work for a living. I mean, I didn’t mean to say that out loud.”
After Howard accidentally insults a police officer while trying to get to the toy store, he quickly realizes his mistake and tries to backtrack with this hilarious line.
9. “This is war.”
After Howard realizes that he is not the only one trying to get a Turbo-Man doll, he declares war on his competition.
10. “Christmas comes once a year!”
Howard is frustrated when his wife reminds him that he forgot to buy Jamie the toy he wanted for Christmas. This quote is a great example of his character’s stress and anxiety.
11. “I’ll be back with the toy… or I’ll be back without the toy, but I’ll be back.”
Howard is determined to get a Turbo-Man doll for his son, no matter what it takes. This quote is a classic example of his character’s persistence.
12. “It’s not a bomb, it’s a letter bomb!”
When Howard mistakes a mail bomb for a gift, he panics and tries to give it to a mall Santa. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that showcases Howard’s cluelessness.
13. “You’re my number one customer!”
Myron tries to win Howard over by telling him that he is his number one customer. This line is a funny example of Myron’s character’s desperation.
14. “You don’t like Turbo-Man? What’s wrong with you?”
Howard is shocked when he finds out that his neighbor’s son doesn’t like Turbo-Man. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that highlights Howard’s obsession.
15. “Ted, just how many balls are you juggling?”
Howard is suspicious of his neighbor Ted’s motives when he sees him spending time with his wife. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that showcases Howard’s jealousy.
16. “I’m sorry, baby. Just put the cookie down. Cookies are for closers.”
When Howard’s wife tries to give him a cookie to calm him down, he tells her that cookies are for closers. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that highlights Howard’s business background.
17. “I’m not a superhero, I’m just a postman.”
Howard is mistaken for the actor who plays Turbo-Man and is forced to play the character at a parade. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that highlights Howard’s discomfort in the role.
18. “What am I going to do with 3000 cookies?”
After accidentally ordering 3000 cookies, Howard is left wondering what he’s going to do with them. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that highlights Howard’s incompetence.
19. “I’m sorry I’m late, I had to stop for gas.”
After Myron shows up late to a toy store, he tries to make an excuse by saying he had to stop for gas. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that showcases Myron’s character’s desperation.
20. “I’m sweating like a dog in a Chinese restaurant.”
Howard is not too pleased when he has to wear a Turbo-Man costume and perform at a parade. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that highlights Howard’s discomfort in the role.
21. “You can’t do that to me, I’m your number one customer!”
Myron is outraged when a store clerk tells him that they are sold out of Turbo-Man dolls. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that showcases Myron’s character’s desperation.
22. “You’re in my way, box!”
Howard is not too pleased when he encounters a box in his way while trying to get a Turbo-Man doll. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that highlights Howard’s frustration.
23. “That’s not a toy, that’s a bomb!”
Howard is suspicious of a package that he thinks might be a bomb. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that showcases Howard’s paranoia.
24. “I’m Howard Langston. I’m looking for Turbo-Man doll.”
Howard introduces himself to store clerks while searching for a Turbo-Man doll. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that showcases Howard’s determination to get the toy.
25. “That’s the spirit. You can’t give up now. Only three more easy payments.”
Myron tries to encourage Howard to keep trying to get a Turbo-Man doll by saying that he only has three more easy payments left. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that showcases Myron’s character’s desperation.
26. “I’m not a piece of meat.”
When Howard mistakes a mail bomb for a gift and tries to give it to a mall Santa, the Santa protests with this funny line.
27. “You want a Turbo-Man for Christmas? Forget it, I’m not gonna sit in your lap.”
Howard is not too pleased when he is asked to sit in Santa’s lap in order to get a Turbo-Man doll. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that highlights Howard’s discomfort.
28. “Who told you you could eat my cookies?”
Howard is not too pleased when he finds out that someone ate his cookies. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that highlights Howard’s frustration.
29. “I’m not a giddy schoolgirl.”
Howard is not too pleased when he is accused of being excited about getting a Turbo-Man doll. This quote is a funny moment in the movie that highlights Howard’s stubbornness.